Remember

Who was there
I want to love you forever
But I have to move on
Move along

School starts in 2 more weeks this was a slow ass week !!!!!!
Can't believe my life still sucks but I don't really mean it . I really want my lens and dedicated selling my games untill I get my lens !!!!!!!!!!

My coworker has an amazing ass!.... Not to be disrespectful but w.e it's not like I'm ever going to talk to her which is strange because she acts the way I like them quiet to herself and respectfull but she looks devious



I got my final grades and I passed with shiity b's >_> eh w.e ......

Well too much to write and little battery life .... Fmi.tbl

Like or not too like

So I see you around
Never make a sound
Look at who I found

Sigh

for that someone
There's a void that needs to be clogged




When I love I change the weather
I think of you and it becomes hard to keep it together
The flow of ideas
And stream of ideals
It's all too real
Your love is all I want to feel

So I smell a quiet mind
Full of life
I keep in mind your mine

Pizza fest

So the past few days have been interesting , a step in a split direction
I'm done with classes and can't wait to start class again , ...... I'm trying to buy my lens but bestbuy sucks when it comes to shipping ....:/ any way .......

That's it for now

Lovers block

So the wall arose
And I'm all alone

Another update

I'm not sure how to describe my surroundings at the moment

I heard a band I haven't heard in a long time ,a band that helped define emo/alt/hardcore who were discoverd by goldfinger . Which is another good band .

It's a band that as teenaged and emotinal as they sound are very talented . Anyway it was a band at a point in my life defined love for me in a deeper level

So as I lay down
I'm astound

.......sooooooooo moving on
I write most of these on my itouch(myself :D )so please excuse the grammer

I'm going to jerk off a bit

Photos

I DID a horrible thing
AND IM SORRY

I SHOULD HAve never thrown your photos
AND NEVER SHOULD HAVE BURNED THEM

I WANT TO RIP MY CHEST OPEN AND GIVE YOU MY FUCKING HEART

I WANT YOU TO SQUeze IT UNTILL IT EXPLODES

AND WATCH THE BLOOD

PAINT THE WALL

AND SPLATTER YOUR FACE

SPEAP INTO YOUR PORES

AND FEEL ME GROW INSIDE OF YOU

So you can feel how hurt I was

So far

So I'm still single
Yes I know :D
Some one as sexy as I
Single

Things are mending
Times bending
If lost my moments in time
I mean to say Iv spaced out
A few times lately
School and work have been on top
Of me more then cheeseyness in a
Soap opera
And iv been a bit careless

In fairness iv never been productive
While being broken hearted
Not to say I am but sometimes it feels like it

Soon someone ..... Just be safe

I'll miss you awkwardly
Things never went anywhere
Sometimes I wonder if I was that person
That was everything that didnt attract you

I honestly did like you and never said a thing too play with your emotions

Hope your apple is shiny red



-------------

So present time
Everything is fine
It's late


So yea I feel like iv said enough
But I'm done
Ask anything and I won't deny

Time to admit something
I'm afraid
The fate of love/fedelity
Passion
.....love lol

I honestly feel like I will never find the one

I don't even know if I believe in "the one"
Never really gave it much thought

Yes one thing I never game much thought too

I let go a long time ago
Just want some one that matches my soul

I am

At peace with the destructin of my well being

Visual appeal

I see those creative souls
I
It's insaine how many beautiful
Minds swarm the hall ways
Each one I feel like painting all over my wall
Grab my brush and Lol you know
The fashion students
With there cocky walks that say
"I know your looking "
The tease
One night with me will leave you more then please

Don't taunt me with the ones that love to
Paint
Everytimr I see one I almost faint
The art of. A saint
So sexy
It's amazing
Just want to grab your hair
I won't hurt you I swear
Mix our reds and white
Make your body feel pale white

I just want to fuck you all night

I love my school
It really defines

Not everything beautiful is full of beauty

No one ever bothers

It's late I took a short nap and I'm still a buy flusterd about my computer situation . So the song war all the time started playing and it made think



War all the time
It's a social crime
I can't fight without a reason
I can't wait for my ending
Because I'm stuck in the middle of slmeone elses war

I finally accept death
I feel it's coming and I don't mean too sound like a depressing asshole but understand this I gave my happyness too some one and never got any in return
I'm. Bored of life I mean i have a few good friends but I need a companion some one that I know has the same mutual ideals of needing too feel and share that side of life

I need
Not want
Because I already had a want

I need someone that loves sex , loves creativity , loves random situations , doesn't mind my funky look , loves to toke , can put up and help me

I can say I was never the best but if never been close to being a bad boyfriend in anyway

I agree with a friend who said I never date a guy(I feel limei haveto say a girl LOL I know some people think I'm gay) unless I see myself with them forever and it really struck me because it was strange for someone other then me to say.

I need to change the world

The day before

I'm really fucking angry ,I'm torn and feel defeated .it's never my nature to say give up but if tried and tried I feel like my life is planned with the worst in mind. I can't stop having moments of frustration and emotional destruction .I can admit I think I'm reaching a breaking point .I never in my world thought I would ever feel what I'm feeling .

Being single could be a part of my problem but being myself is a part of the first problem . So as I'm laying down writing how I feel,bluntly, no poems or anything ,I keep wondering is it worth it ?

Is it fair for myself ? Is it fair that I put up with such buildup ?is it ok to live the way I'm living ? It's an everyday situation and it's literally showing

I don't feel as alone as I used too
I don't care as much in some situations
And all I want to do is fuck do drugs, Listen and make music , do artwork and inspire

I think my dreams are slowly coming true
The problem is , my dreams were never about myself

I really wonder who took the time to read this , I should buy you lunch and hope my card doesn't get declined because my life likes to fuck me like that randomly

The day that girl comes along
I hope she knows what sacrifice means
I'm done falling apart alone

And you walk away

When the sky falls
I'll cry till dawn
Fall to sleep so our dreams come true
Don't be afraid
Of What your mind can see
We must make a stand for what we believe
During the struggle
They will pin us down
But please let's use this to turn things around

Bright horizon
Fires
Flood and faith
During the struggle
I'll hold you
Your faith
It's in breakable

During the struggle
They will pull us down

TALK TO ME
how could this be
Our sores
When our arms bend
Our eyes bleed
Our heart flat lines


I'v had recurring nightmares




That I was loved for who I am






.....and missed the opportunity to be a better man

My turn

So.........

Let me tell you a love story
It's a little blurry

I once met a girl
I fell in love
And then it was over

I'm happy for her misfortune
But I'm sad at my gain

Years and years
I'm single
And I never thought I would be alive after
Such pain

Past few months felt like
Everyday was filled with rain




Ok that's done

So let me smile
Laugh for a while

Where a man is defined

You showed me to live like this
By showing me love is priceless
Even if life is a hit or miss
If any man knows what it is to be a man
It's too know where he stands

I glance to the sky
Sigh
I'm not lost in my mind
Just want something too find
I know how I stand

I learn from the streets
I know where lovers meet
I still have blood on my feet
I know mentally I"ll never be beat
I know why I stand

Broken glass
I'm dying fast
I moved from my past
I won't die last
I know the sacrifice of a man

We hold our smokes
Between our lips we leave a gap
We burn
And we exhale
Like hope our lungs will soon look pale
I know I have to let go of bad habits to become a better man

I know where I stand
When people die they take a part of me
I just want you too see
I'm a man with a plan
I know my reason for which I stand

Land of the lost

Your open
But live in a cave
Still not a mental slave
You mend like no other
You came across
And surprised me
Maybe your wiser then me
You want ccontrol
Because it let's other dig your hole
Maybe because...........

I'm better make sure your lookig closely
before You enter your next swoon
And sway with awareness
A good organized mess
I felt refresshed

You write
And write
Full of emotional fight
Take control

Maybe because you have a hurt soul

......

Remove my soul from this planet
Im giving up on love

Sex

i never wrote a poem about sex from what I recall I don't like this one but it's an idea

I'm definitly redo this one :)



So he shoves it in your face
Asks "baby do you like how it taste"
You reply with seduction
"baby yours is the best , better then the rest"
He bites your lips
And licks your lit
He grabs your waist
And tells you how great you taste

I look down on you
I smile
It's hard
And your smile always gets to me
I love that get up
It always gets me up

Streets

City streets
Were love and warfare meets
I belong And I feel it
These lights
There so bright
Ally ways
So dark
They match like the emotions in my heart
Cracked pavements
And
Like my vains
They stain
They both relate
Experienced pain we both learn to retain
Homeless
I can't focus
Like a vagabond
I'm looked down on
Past time floods these streets
Like the blood that fills my head in this Miami heat
High rises filled with the rich
the ones where us vagabonds call a currupted bitch

The city full of mismatches
It's beautifull
I know I can never detach

I know my streets
They let my heart beat
These streets they never sleep
I will never forget you
Scratches from tires
It's a part of my desire
Downtown your more then a fire

I'm a part of you
I look for you
When I feel blue
The only one that's been truely you


I love you LOL

A war part 3

Bullet wounds
And smoke grenades
Like emotional stabs
And a drunks broken glass
The streets shine with flares of bombs
Like our home land were we celebrate independence
The same were destroying

We take lives
As fast as we lie
Every time
We march
Across the streets
Blood paints the walls
We fall to our knees in the churches hall

Silence six eight zero four

Three chalk outlines sleep in the dirty streets
And we lose ourselves in our sleep
And we scream "REPENT REPENT OH GO"
Was this amessage sent from the dove streaming in the horizon
Sent from peace makers

Someday I'll write the perfect poem for the hopeful

Silence six eight zero four

Three chalk outlines sleep in the dirty streets
And we lose ourselves in our sleep
And we scream "REPENT REPENT OH GO"
Was this amessage sent from the dove streaming in the horizon
Sent from peace makers

Someday I'll write the perfect poem for the hopeful

Time

My room is still a mess
My heart is still in my chest
It's sad but no one ever cared to know the rest
I can dream
And tell you what things mean
I can slow down time
I have
And it's wonderful
I felt like I was full of soul
Now



Time is at a dead halt
I pray it's not my fault



Everynight
I vision you turning back
With that glance
Playing zelda


I remeber where our hearts used to meet
Now we look away
And my heart skips a beat

It reminds me
about times arrow
And how unbiased
Unfair
Without care

Changed my life







It's not how I imagined us
It was never lust
Girl you still hold a part of my love
I can't deny
Because, love is something better with no lie

But you wore me down
And I degrade
I'm times renegade


Time is on no ones side
Don't worry
Life is a planned ride
Just remember you decide
Which is your ride

Letters to you

It's been months since iv heard from you
But I'm writing this just incase
Iv drowned myself to sleep a few times
But that's alright
Either sink or swim ,right ?
........
I knew this would be difficult
But i never knew the other side of love
Would swallow you whole
Is he loving you right
Holding you , making you feel alright ?
When you cry does he tell you things that makes the pain go away ?

I never strayed

I can't think
So I'll drink untill I sleep
Arches in your eye brows
That upside down frown

I don't care anymore as much as I still want you

I don't care nothing has changed

I don't care your history is mine



It's all mine


Tomorrow i'll wake up fine

So I'm writing you this letter I know
You will never read
I'm keeping alot inside


I'm hurt

Time doesn't heal
It only streches pain
Experience heals

I hope your ok

My regards